BALTIMORE — Members of local band Wasted Rat agreed yesterday that the guitar solo in their new song “absolutely rips,” but immediately turned to arguing after their singer claimed he was “pretty sure the solo was his idea,” annoyed bandmates confirmed.
“See, Alex [Clifford] was originally playing the solo at practice like, ‘bahhh bin wah-win-wahhhh.’ Which was perfectly fine, but I felt it was very average and needed something different, ya know? Something that really made it pop. I vaped on it, then it hit me — and I told Alex how to play this badass riff,” said lead singer Phillip Leamy. “And like, I’m pretty sure that’s when I told Alex that it should go like, ‘weeee wan-wan-wan baaaa-bahhhh dee-wahhhhh.’ But at the end of the day, this was all a team effort: I’m just like the captain, or coach. Probably a mix of both.”
Clifford was quick to note that his band’s frontman does not know how to play guitar, nor has he ever played guitar.
“Beating every version of ‘Rock Band’ doesn’t count as knowing how to play guitar,” said a visibly frustrated Clifford. “Just saying, ‘Play it this way!’ while making noises with your mouth or whatever doesn’t mean that it was your idea. I still had to write it and play it. It’s not like he invented the concept of solos — they’ve been around forever.”
Those close to Leamy claim this type of behavior extends beyond the practice space.
“When I got a promotion at work, he said it was probably because he told me that I should make more money,” said Phillip’s mother, Denise Leamy. “Can you believe it? He told me told me to make more money only after I told him I couldn’t afford to pay his rent forever.”
All agree, however, that the most egregious may have been when Leamy tried to take credit for drummer Darren Webb’s recent engagement to his girlfriend.
“If it wasn’t for me, they would’ve never met,” said Leamy. “He’d probably still be dating that awful woman Jenna, but thankfully, I had sex with her while Darren was in Aruba and he broke up with her as soon as he found out.”