I knew going into the office kitchenette was a mistake. I foolishly exchanged pleasantries with someone from accounting, I think his name is Harold but…
Making new friends as an adult can be challenging. But fear not, good reader—here are our tried-and-true tips for how to make a brand new…
ELK GROVE, Calif. — Local man Ron Gibbard finally added buddy Jake Monroe to his contact list on his phone despite three years of friendship…
So, I’m telling the other servers I work with about this chick I nailed after my set last night, when they suddenly confront me about…
ROCKFORD, Ill. — Beer delivery driver Harrison Fleming thought he was close to making a new friend, bartender Theo Stills, but ultimately alienated Stills by…
Whoa, what a night. Always good to catch up with the old crew when I’m back in town. Glad we could all get together for…
At 38 and in a somewhat intentional bachelorhood after powerful, romantic relationships that ended slowly and grimly to send me to a therapist’s couch, I…
LOS ANGELES — Local woman Carmen Montozo admitted to knowing intimate details about each dog in her neighborhood while failing to learn the names of…
Prejudice is a uniquely human trait, but we’re not content limiting our malignant biases to just our fellow man, are we? Thanks to misinformation in…
EUGENE, Ore. — Leo Radler, a bartender at local pub The Swampland, is completely unaware that many of the regular patrons of his place of…
WORCESTER, Mass. — Diehard Wu-Tang Clan fan Jeremy Taggart recently admitted that his obsession with the legendary rap group stems mostly from the appealing fantasy…
Hey, just checking in. I know you’ve been going through a lot lately, and I want you to know I’m here for you. So what’s…
It’s happened. The day has come. Your beloved white friend has asked you to give their favorite Wilco album a listen. They have sworn up…
Alright, I want everyone to just settle down. I realize many of you find this unorthodox, but let’s focus on the facts. Yes, this man…
PRINCETON, N.J. – Researchers at Princeton University concluded a nearly decade-long project which yielded inconclusive results regarding whether your long-time friend Charlotte Palmerro actually likes…