Mark Shady
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SAN FRANCISCO — Popular rideshare app Uber announced a new feature that would match intoxicated riders with intoxicated drivers, confirmed…
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Sarah Cortina
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MADISON, Wis. — Local loser Jim Perkins reportedly found his DUI from two beers kind of embarrassing, confirmed sources who…
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S.L. Neechski
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LOS ANGELES — Director and grizzled high school shop teacher look-alike Mel Gibson announced this week that his next project,…
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Sarah Cortina
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SAG HARBOR, NY — Justin Timberlake announced his next album will be about how the popular alcoholic beverage Long Island…
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Chris Bowen
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WATERLOO, N.Y. — Staunch MAGA Republican and binge-drinker Justin Brently decided to show his unwavering support for Donald Trump after…
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Mike Maher
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So you hit up the Taco Bell Cantina happy hour with some co-workers, slammed spicy margs till last call, were…
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Dan Rice
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Well, Christmas is almost here and that means two things: You really want to get a PS5 this year, and…
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Ben Friedman
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Ugh, what a day. I never want to see the inside of a courtroom again! Seriously, you drive drunk through…
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Colleen Nerney
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PITTSBURGH – A prototype driverless car, manufactured by local technology start-up High Drive, crashed into a telephone pole and was…
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Rob Steinberg
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Horrible news. It looks like Chris, our friend who drove us to the party, wants to stay longer. He seems…
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