Alfred Barnes
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September 9, 2025
BALTIMORE — Black metal vocalist Ben “Plaguebearer” Rockwood wreaked havoc during Wincrest Elementary’s recent Play Day following questionable face paintings…
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Hannah Cohen
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April 19, 2024
ROCHESTER, N.Y. — Local black metal artist Aortic Burst was humiliated yesterday when his coworkers listened to, and subsequently legitimately…
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Rob Ryder
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December 11, 2022
HARRISBURG, Pa. — Fans of black metal stalwarts Bloodfrost became disenchanted with the supposedly Satanic quartet when it was recently…
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Tim Graham
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September 1, 2022
BUFFALO, N.Y. — New father Gareth Desmond began to question his wife’s fidelity after she gave birth to a baby…
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Matt McInerney
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December 8, 2021
PHOENIX — Aging members of local metal band Toxins in the Bloodstream are deep in a spiraling debate about whether…
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Nathan Kamal
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April 15, 2021
CHICAGO — Local metalhead, avid corpse paint donner and frequent leather pants wearer Zachary Petrosyan is reportedly fed up with…
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Justin Lentz
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May 14, 2020
OSLO, Norway — Local guitarist Evan “Blood Vacuum” Brulend upset his bandmates yesterday when a filtering mishap revealed his corpse…
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THE INTERNET - The often misunderstood world of adult face-painting went on high alert this week when Youtube user GoatLord666Watain…
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