Ben Friedman
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I’ve been called a lot of things: selfish, immature, annoying, and, according to my 10th-grade English teacher, an unserious student…
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FRANKFORT, Ky. — Oft-succumbing and soon-dying United States senator Mitch McConnell revealed his post-political plans of destroying all the houses…
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Trevor Graham
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So you’ve just slipped away from your soul-sucking job for a quick break, but now what? Go for a smoke?…
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ASHEVILLE, N.C. — Local show-goer and humanitarian Eric Stevenson displayed a level of altruism never before seen at a punk…
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Zach Hudson
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FARGO, N.D. — Local punk Calvin “Patch” McCambell is receiving less than stellar reviews from his community regarding his self-proclaimed…
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Chris Bowen
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BINGHAMTON, N.Y. — Local punk Chaz Long used very creative accounting techniques when he wrote off his support for his…
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Matt Bieker
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ASTORIA, Ore. — Local PR account manager Madison Auerbach decided there is more value in referring to people as “unhoused”…
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Goodrich Gevaart
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LIMA, Ohio — A large, unattended assortment of pumpkins located in front of Lima Bethelem Church are apparently free for…
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Dianne Nora
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NEW YORK — Compassionate Queens native Kacey Mora selflessly volunteered her time to help bathe actor and infrequent washer Jake…
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Jeremy Kaplowitz
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LOS ANGELES — The cast of ABC’s 2007 television show Cavemen reunited for a Zoom table read of an unaired…
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