Patrick Coyne
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MACON, Ga. — Panic-stricken and barely coherent GWAR roadie Miles Giodarno was spotted dashing through the streets of Macon, desperately…
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James Knapp
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LOS ANGELES — Notorious punk rock ghoul Matt Skiba was spotted monotonously saying the phrase “I’m a spooky boy” over…
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Chris Jones
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HOUSTON — Scientists at NASA monitoring the Perseverance Rover made a startling discovery today when it sent back photos of…
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Sophie Len
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Hold on to your butts because this is huge. The government has officially confirmed the existence of UFOs and, presuming…
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Patrick Crooks
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SOMEWHERE BETWEEN EARTH AND LV-462 — The Weyland-Yutani Corporation has found themselves under intense scrutiny after a xenomorph alien slaughtered…
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M.J. Amory
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PLUCART SYSTEM — Local alien Blixbor Raxorit once again boastfully yammered on about his Linux-based human life simulator called ‘Earth,’…
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Steve Fiorillo
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Once again Hollywood has shown that it is not the diverse, progressive paradise it wants us to think it is.…
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