Press "Enter" to skip to content

Breaking: Band Has One Song Left, “You Guys Have Been Great”

DALLAS — After a 25-minute set to a sparse audience last night, opening band Leo and the Mayfairs announced they only had one song remaining and, much to the crowd’s pleasure, complimented everyone in the room for being “such a great audience.”

“Frankly, I was caught off guard. I think we sort of suck as an audience,” said show attendee Felicia Lyons. “Most of us were texting during their set, I keep yawning… barely anyone clapped when they finished a song. But when he took time out of their set to thank us for coming out, suddenly, I wished they had time for a few more. Or at least a few more compliments for us all.”

Up until the kind words, frontman Leo Mancinni had tried repeatedly to engage the crowd to no avail.

“I sort of feel bad for the guys. They started off with so much energy, and then just tapered off when they realized the crowd wasn’t feeling it,” said bartender Laura Arguello. “The singer asked how everyone was doing tonight after their first song and nobody replied. Not even a woo — just silence. It was kind of eerie.”


Witnesses report the crowd met the announcement by stomping their boots and high-fiving one another in the biggest applause of the night.

“Everyone loves when a band lets you know how much time they have left, so when he told us it was their last song, we all just went nuts,” said Rob Woods, who led chants from the upstairs balcony. “They even made sure we made some noise for all the other bands we were gonna see that night. That’s class, man. That is fuckin’ respect,” later adding, “Too bad their music was awful. They seem like really nice dudes.”

As of press time, Leo and the Mayfairs had just completed their final song, informing the audience about CDs available in the back with Mancinni adding, “Come on back and say hello.”

Photo by Senny Mau @SimplySenny.