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While You Were Distracted by Maroon 5’s Super Bowl Disaster, Nickelback Approved Massive Tax Cuts for the 1%

Nearly 2 weeks after Maroon 5’s infamously bad Pepsi Super Bowl Halftime Show performance and they are still the butt of the internet’s joke. Meme’s mocking the band are still in heavy circulation online, and even celebrities like Charlie Day have joined in the fun of kicking the band while they’re down. Yes, it’s a complete circus, and as it turns out that’s exactly what the 1% wanted.

While you were all distracted by one of the worst halftime shows on record, Nickelback quietly passed legislation that will gut federal aid programs and make the countries richest people even richer.

Note: This article makes use of several subtle Nickelback references that, while incredibly clever, may escape the readers notice. These references have all been marked by the “*” symbol.

This is why we can’t trust the media. They fed you a smoke screen and you just eat it right u like the dumb fuck sheeple you are. While Adam Levine literally song and danced his way into your living rooms Chad Kroeger quietly installed his band as a section of congress, formed a sub committee and approved laws that will give massive tax cuts to people like Jeff Bezos while depriving poverty line children of school lunches. I guess this is what Kroeger meant when he said he’s not a “Leader of Men.*”

Thanks Nickelback. This Is How You Remind Me* that the 1% does not care about us. Look at This Photograph.*

It depicts the American dream being boxed up and sold off to the highest bidder.

Never before has economic prosperity been so Far Away* from the middle class. Thanks to this band, the republicans, and their corporate masters, millions of hard working Americans are about to find it Harder And Harder to Breath,* financially speaking. Nickelback and the GOP have just short changed the very voters who welcomed them both With Arms Wide Open.* These politicians have all gone Crazy and I for one refuse to call them Superman.* It’s Been a While* since we’ve taken action. Call your representative today an ask them, “Can you help me? I’m Bent.”*

Chickity china the chinese chicken.*