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Uncontacted Tribe Hasn’t Even Heard About Banksy’s Self-Destructing Painting Yet

JAKARTA, Indonesia — The uncontacted people of the Teriku tribe are the last-known living humans yet to hear of Banksy’s self-destructing painting stunt from earlier this week, experts confirmed.

“When I study these tribes, I can see exactly how they live without western agricultural practices and electricity… but I do not understand how nobody told them yet about how Banksy totally boned some anonymous art collector,” said Chris Randall, a budding anthropologist at Stanford University. “Personally, I can’t go an hour without my phone, and it seems like the whole world has Banksy on the brain. ”

Even the most seasoned anthropologists were shocked by the discovery.

“For years, we have had remote cameras set up to monitor the health and well-being of the Teriku — and when we checked up on them after the Banksy prank, it looked like business as usual,” said Dr. Brianna Price, a pioneer in Indonesian anthropological studies. “It made no sense. Not once did someone stop and randomly say, ‘Hey, did you see that shredded painting thing?’”

The discovery led Price to wonder about the cultural fallout for a tribe potentially unaware of Banksy at all.

“How will they learn all of the moral lessons found in Banksy’s work?” Price said. “Without access to pieces like ‘Mobile Romance,’ how will they learn about the dangers of technology and social media? It’s my practice to never judge any undiscovered tribe, but this is just sad.”

Already, concerned citizens from the industrialized West hope to raise awareness of satirical street art within the tribe.

“It is time for somebody to intervene and help these desperate people,” said Drew Keeling, founder of the activist group Banksy Without Borders, which shows indigenous tribespeople screenshots of Banksy pieces as part of its mission. “These tribes cannot live like this. It’s inhumane — they need access to hot food, and even hotter takes on globalism!”

At press time, the Tariku were hurling spears at a group of art student missionaries carrying copies of Banksy’s book Wall and Piece.

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