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Punk Band Booked at Sober Space Makes Another Trip to the Van

JACKSONVILLE, FL – For the fifth time tonight, all four members of the punk band Junkyard Gods walked from the alcohol-free venue/pizzeria to their van, reported 19-year-old Charlie Richardson, who booked the out-of-town group.

Despite the outdoor temperature reaching a high of 92 degrees, the four-piece group on tour from Chicago, Illinois spent a cumulative total of 120 minutes in the van before their set, which was parked backwards next to the dumpster, “just sort of hanging out” witnesses report.

“I asked them where they’d been during the first band’s set, and they said they were tuning,” Richardson said. “Which I thought was kinda weird, because the drummer and vocalist went too and they had already loaded in their gear. Such good dudes.”

Richardson, who books shows at Uptown Pizza, an all-ages space that does not allow any alcohol, said he was confused but not at all worried.

“They’re really cool guys,” Richardson said while checking his watch. “After the third or fourth trip to the van, they got a lot more talkative and friendly.”

The band members were overheard using a variety of different excuses to duck out to the van, such as needing to grab some extra drum sticks, and to show a female fan how good the new windshield wipers are working.

When asked about their time in the van, guitarist Drew Rodriguez thought for a moment before responding.

“We just, uh, really need to spend time by ourselves before we play a show,” Rodriguez said, swaying slightly back and forth. “It’s, y’know, all about focusing and stuff… Wait, do you work here?”


Drummer Sam “Studs” McAllister went on to comment on “how cool it is” that they could play an all-ages show at a pizzeria, even though drinking was not permitted.

“They gave us drink tickets when we showed up, which we thought was for beer at first, but turned out to be for soda, or a Capri Sun, or some other bullshit,” McAllister said, pausing to hiccup. “But you don’t always have to, uh, drink to have fun, y’know? We’re just happy to be here. Hold on a second, I gotta, uh, run to the van to check the PSI in the spare tire.”

Photo by Christopher Yafchak @chris_nozo.

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