SACRAMENTO, Calif. — Governor Gavin Newson signed a historic bill that would require all residents to undergo a seven-day waiting period before purchasing podcast equipment,…
COLUMBUS, Ohio — Local vegan child Jackson Lavigne asked his friends if anyone planned to eat the Smarties and that he’d even be willing to…
LAS VEGAS — Former Vice President Mike Pence dropped out of the 2024 presidential race Saturday after grazing a door knob previously touched by a…
SACRAMENTO, Calif. – Classically trained stage actor Douglas McNulty is returning to the role of the chainsaw-wielding “Psycho Clown Zombie #3” in the Historic Ardenwood…
ADELAIDE, Australia — Iconic movie monster the Babadook was recently seen chain-smoking in a Hungry Jack’s parking lot after learning it was a metaphor for…
ATLANTA — The popularity of Home Depot’s “12-Foot-Tall Skeleton” reached a fever pitch this year, and employees of the megastore chain were instructed to start…
GAZA CITY — Israel’s Defense Minister Yoav Gallant defended the continued bombing of Palestinian civilians by asserting Hamas leaders are hiding inside the local children,…
Halloween: just one of many holidays that, upon reaching adulthood, is little more than an excuse to get absolutely shitfuck wasted without being judged as…
NEW YORK – A recent Bloomberg report announced that Taylor Swift’s wealth is now an estimated $1.1 Billion, after her record-breaking Eras tour and left…
SPOKANE, Wash. — A 12-foot tall Home Depot skeleton found himself under a mountain of skepticism after listing his height as 14 feet on Hinge,…
CONCORD, N.H. — Local high schooler Colin Black recently expressed interest in learning to skateboard but has serious reservations because of his advanced age, sources…
LONDON – Just hours after announcing a “new” Beatles song enabled by artificial intelligence, the surviving members of the seminal rock group, Paul McCartney and…
CHARLOTTE – Local newlyweds Sarah Jones and Doug Tayler were caught off guard towards the end of their wedding celebration when management from the event…
CHICAGO – Local stoner Matt Reed recently discovered that his daily alarm at 4:20 p.m. wasn’t received well during his trial for possession, scowling sources…
LOS ANGELES — Actor Mark Wahlberg believes the off-duty Alaska Airlines pilot who tried to take down a plane mid-flight by cutting the engines was…