AUSTIN, Texas — Local man Evan Stark’s highly anticipated acid trip at progressive rock band Organic Matter’s outdoor concert was foiled by the opening band playing well past when their set was supposed to end, confirmed multiple sources who believe the smoke machine might be a living dragon.
“I had this all planned out perfectly, checked the set times, looked at the past setlists, I even called the venue to confirm when curfew is,” said Stark. “This is bullshit. It’s 9:20 and this band is still fucking playing. I didn’t know opening bands were allowed to do encores. I should be peaking during ‘Spacetime Continuum,’ my favorite song, but no, now I’m going to peak when a bunch of roadies are breaking down equipment. Didn’t they think about how this would affect their fans’ experience? I can’t be the only person this is happening to.”
Organic Matter drummer Sheldon Scott was far from empathetic that the band’s set time being pushed back had “ruined” Stark’s evening.
“Look, we love our fans, but I really, really don’t care that we’re messing up this guy’s acid trip by letting River Ritual play an extra long set tonight,” said Scott. “We’re trying to distance ourselves from the image of being a band you go to see on drugs anyway. Hell, all of us have been sober since 2008. Maybe he should just try and actually enjoy River Ritual. Their new stuff is great, and probably really great on acid if I had to guess.”
Promoter Haley North, who has been booking shows for over twenty years, described Stark’s planning as “amateur,” and offered her advice on how Stark and other showgoers could get the most out of their psychedelic experience in the future.
“First of all, we posted the new set times on Instagram this morning, so clearly this guy isn’t the master planner that he thinks he is,” said North. “You can try and control your trip as much as you want, but it’s never going to go entirely as planned, so just go with the flow. I bet he didn’t even test this stuff beforehand. It could be bunk for all he knows. Regardless, better luck next time, and no, we will not be offering him a refund.”
At press time, sources report that Stark’s pupils grew to the size of dinner plates, and the fact that “Come on Eileen” was part of the set break playlist gave him “some seriously weird vibes.”