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Local Hardcore Legend Has Really Shitty Job

DETROIT — Mike Avery, the legendary frontman of 90s hardcore band Turnaround has recently been spotted working at a terribly shitty job.

Avery, widely considered to be one of the most influential frontmen of his generation – in both a musical and personal sense – can be found at the Twelve Oaks Mall working at the “Olive You Forever” gourmet olives kiosk on most weekdays.

“It’s crazy to see him here. I would be at every Turnaround show in the 90s. That guy right over there in his little uniform was my hero growing up. I guess it’s kind of sad, in a way. He spoke with so much charisma and passion on stage about life and all its challenges but now he just hands out free olive samples,” Robert Norton, a patron of the mall, said. “I wonder if he is still straight edge?”

After about 30 minutes of explaining why exactly Hard Times reporters weren’t trying to interview him for a documentary about Turnaround, Avery agreed to speak with us about his current situation.

“Check it out, man, I wouldn’t change a thing. Hardcore introduced me to some of the best people in the world and now I get to house sit for them when they go on family vacations. Our first guitarist quit the band to go to college – he is a chemical engineer for BP now – and I stay in a room above his garage,” the legend said.

 

Related: Old Guy Looking out of Place at Show Apparently Local Legend

Although he used to sing in front of hundreds of enthusiastic kids who knew every word to his songs, Avery says he’s happy waking up and catching the 5:30 a.m. bus to clean olive jars and take shit from his 18-year-old supervisor, Vanessa Morton.

Morton praised Avery for his good work ethic and natural ability to sell gourmet olives, but added, “I just wish he didn’t dress like a teenager; he is in his 40s and it’s starting to look a bit desperate.”

Article by The Hard Times Staff. Photo by Jason Mazzola.

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18 Comments

  1. wallyspo January 16, 2015

    This reminds me of the time I saw a member of a pretty well known band in Hardcore and Metal circuit stocking the sleeves at Toys R Us a few years back.

  2. Hollywood January 16, 2015

    This is sad but very true. With the way the music Industry is now a days you cant really bank on success that will carry you a life time. (more so if ur a hardcore band) The days of the power house rock band n true rock stars is long gone. (Thanx to napster)
    music industry is failing. Big time! As music supporters, listeners and fans WE r failing miserably. We want it all and we want it now. We down load everything for free n show no support to the bands. (Eg. Actually buying the music, go to the concerts n buying merch) and wonder what happen to that band u loved etc. Well they went under. You didnt support them. A band is a business… a fun one but still a business. It cost a lot of money to make music n put on live shows, as well touring to them)
    If you ever wondered why bands look so tired n ruff after tour or while on it?
    Well as exciting n fun as it is, it also can b very taxing, stressful n eye opening. (More so for indie bands)
    The simple cost of living n eating can prove stressful as well as getting a good nights sleep.

  3. Jake January 16, 2015

    A legend? Who the hell is Mike Avery? I know tons of huge musicians who still work 9-5’s. Maybe if he was a “Top 40 Pop Artist” that would be strange seeing him in the mall, but an underground HC singer from the 90’s having to work a job? Yeah…

    • Sean January 16, 2015

      This story has got to be fake. Looks like the tattoos are photoshopped.

      • ough January 16, 2015

        Of all things you pick the tattoos and say they’re photshopped?! How about the sign OR THE MAN STANDING IN FRONT IF THE PLACE WITH THE WHITE BORDERS AROUND HIS BODY?!

    • ihatebillconway January 16, 2015

      Mike was in Turnaround, they are fucking legendary dude.

    • punks are fags January 27, 2015

      its sattire
      chill

  4. Smarter than You January 16, 2015

    you guys realize this IS a joke right? This page is like the onion of hardcore. Stop making us look stupid commenters.

  5. Great Bear January 16, 2015

    Turnaround were up there with Chain, Gorilla Cookies and Judge back in the 90s, such a good band. Great to see Mike is doing well for himself, dude always told it straight.

    • photogeek23 January 16, 2015

      “Good Hardcore Band” doesn’t really seem deserving of comparisons to GB, Judge and Chain. Especially if they were from the 90’s.

  6. Josh Doll January 16, 2015

    This was my life when I saw Jim from Champion in the produce section of my neighborhood Whole Foods. But also, Whole Foods produce is actually a good job.

    • ihatebillconway January 16, 2015

      Josh do you live in Portland?

  7. Andrea January 16, 2015

    So. He didn’t cash out on hardcore. Well. That’s even more admirable.

  8. Thermonuclearpenguin January 17, 2015

    Doh! I just got scammed. I didn’t vet before my comment on FB, I know better than that. Fucking You Hard Core Times, I will kick all you in your man and lady jimmy parts. And so to Avery, suck it up douche. Apply for a real job at Rue19.

    Good job HCT, not easy to get one over my head…my reflexes are too fast…I would usually catch it.

  9. Spike January 17, 2015

    This is a great site but nothing on it is real so don’t get so bent. Sit back and enjoy the stories.

  10. Brian January 18, 2015

    There are other MIke Avery stories. Take a flight into Seattle sometime and walk into the SubPop label store in the main concourse. You’ll may run into MIke PIckerel, who was the original drummer for the Screaming Trees. LIke Avery, here is another modern legend working a gig you least expect. He’s the store’s assistant manager.

  11. John January 21, 2015

    I used to work with a member of Dying Fetus 4 years ago. He was in the telemarketing dept.

  12. Rod Munch January 26, 2015

    Fun Fact…Both the singer and drummer of Monstrosity who were a big time FL death metal Band in the 90s.(Toured with the big names had videos on MTV etc.) live in thier parents basements at and are in thier 40s. The drummer is unemployed.

Comments are closed.