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38-Year-Old at Show Keeps Reminding Himself He’s Having a Good Time

PITTSBURGH — Local 38-year old man Justin Peterson spent the majority of the show that he is currently reminding himself that he is, in fact, having a good time and is happy to be there.

“I haven’t been to a show in forever,” said Peterson, while clutching the $8 Miller High Life. “So when some of the younger guys at work told me about this gig, I figured what the fuck. I just wish I hadn’t forgotten my earplugs, and it kind of feels weird to be like, 15-years older than anyone else here. Also, my back is going to feel like shit tomorrow from standing on this concrete floor.”

Sarah Sandfrey, a 22-year-old student at Carnegie Mellon, spotted Peterson lying to himself about his ability to still hang like it’s 2006 while attending the same show.

“Yeah, that old dude looks miserable,” said Sandfrey. “He keeps crossing his arms, and then does, like, a head shake and uncrosses them. And he has pins up and down the lapel of his jean jacket that say like, Ted Leo and shit. Is that a name badge or something? I could tell he was really uncomfortable standing, because he was, like, shifting around all the time and arching his back. He must be like, 33 or something.”

The Cheap Seats lead guitarist, Steve Meznick, was happy to see Peterson in the audience.

“We love seeing all kinds of people at shows,” said Meznick at a set break during which Peterson checked his watch four times. “It’s great when you can attract young and old, and whenever I look out there, they’re totally loving it. The twenty-year-olds, the twenty-five-year-olds, I think I even saw someone’s dad out there. Our music is really for everyone. I always know we’re really hitting in hard when people start dancing, like that old guy who was doing some kind of old-school flex dance.”

As of press time, the bassist of The Cheap Seats was reminding himself that he still loves performing in shitty bars.