Before I started practicing meditation, the stresses of the world got to me. The global pandemic, crippling inflation, and of course the repercussions of my toxic behavior all weighed heavily on me.
Since I’ve been ‘balancing my chi’ on the reg, I’m a whole new person. I’ve been able to disregard the fears associated with a fake disease, I stopped caring about a conflict that doesn’t affect me, I only pay for what I don’t shoplift.
Most importantly I just don’t give a rat’s ass anymore that some co-workers, family members, and every person I’ve ever dated find my personality poisonous. That’s their journey, mine is exploiting them.
Thank you meditation!
I’ve always heard that mindfulness is great for your mental well-being, but I truly underestimated how much benefit it could actually have. Before Deepak Chopra took me on his ‘Soul of Healing’ journey I used to wonder why all my colleagues got quiet when I entered the room, and what HR meant by “a documented pattern of intimidation, manipulation, and general toxicity.”
When they ordered me to take a stress management seminar I was outraged, and vowed to hatch a plan that would get everyone in HR fired. Turns out it was a blessing in disguise, and thanks to the mental clarity meditation has given me, my plan to get everyone in HR fired is not only ahead of schedule, but I’m also brainstorming ways to go after their families.
All my troubles vanished after I dedicated myself to my mind, body, and spirit. I was able to quiet the voice in my head saying that I’m a problematic piece of shit that needs to atone for his behavior or he’s gonna lose his job and die alone. Nobody needs that.
Meditation has also been a Godsend in my personal life. I used to worry that acting like an asshole to family, friends, and neighbors was the reason I’d sit alone in the garage drinking, while everyone avoided me like I was some kind of monster. Now, I’m drinking alone in the garage cultivating mindfulness.
Since I’ve gained a better understanding of my true inner essence, I’ve been able to take those ugly feelings about myself and just ignore them, because I am just as nature, in all its wonderful divinity, intended — a perfect being. And if Gary next door doesn’t like the way I make kissing sounds at his wife when she jogs by, that’s his problem.
Now get the fuck out of my office, you’re cutting into my daily loving-kindness breathing affirmations!