Pop-Punk Diocese Transfers Frontman to New Band
SANDUSKY, Ohio — The Pop Punk Diocese of Ohio is facing a wave of criticism following the transfer of a…
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Patrick Crooks — Page 8
162 stories found
Punk Starting to Regret Using One of Three Wishes to Bring GG Allin Back to Life
ASHEVILLE, N.C. — Local punk Adam Schultz is beginning to regret using one of his three wishes to bring infamous…
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Man Learns Japanese So He Can Watch Kurosawa Movies Without Having to Look Up From Phone
NEW YORK — Self-described “cinema aficionado” Kevin Clifford has spent the past several months becoming fluent in Japanese in order…
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Report: Everyone Still Secretly Listening to Canceled Artist
BOSTON — A study by researchers at MIT has found that nearly every person who has publicly denounced a canceled…
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37-Year-Old Surprised How Susceptible to Peer Pressure He Is
WALDORF, Md. — Otherwise well-adjusted 37-year-old adult Sean Collier realized yesterday that he still folds under the slightest peer pressure…
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Punk’s Mouth Was Actually Bleeding Before Fight Started
WORCESTER, Mass. — Local punk Britney Callahan assured onlookers moments ago that despite the rather violent scuffle she was involved…
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Venue Owner Just Remembered They Left Sound Guy Locked In Prior to Pandemic
WASHINGTON — Independent venue owner Joe Englert panicked early yesterday morning after realizing he’s left sound guy Jake Montgomery locked…
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Family Guy Celebrates 20th Season as Background Noise
LOS ANGELES — The hit animated sitcom “Family Guy” is celebrating 20 seasons this year as America’s top choice for…
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You Gave a Bad Review To the Wrong Etsy Seller, Motherfucker
“Overall, a huge disappointment and not worth the money or hassle” You know what those are? Those are your last…
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Plane Crash Survivors Impressed by Vegan’s Commitment
UNKNOWN — Survivors of Icelandair Flight 198, which crashed somewhere deep in the Arctic tundra last week, lauded vegan survivor…
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