Awkward Teen Tries to Hide in Locker Next to Crush During School Shooting
RENO, Nev. — Sweaty and bumbling 16-year-old Skyler Donovan attempted to hide in a locker today next to his crush…
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John Danek — Page 37
450 stories found
Kidz Bop Songwriting Team Really Struggling With Death Grips Cover
NEW YORK — The in-house songwriting and production team behind the Kidz Bop series fell into writer’s block this week…
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Goth Not Sure How Many Corsets to Pack for Camping Trip
COVINGTON, Ky. — Magick shop owner and obvious goth Maryanne "Luna" Hobbes couldn’t decide this morning how many corsets to…
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We Sit Down With the Sick, Sad Man Who Allows Websites to Send Him Desktop Notifications
Sure, it happens to the best of us- You're reading the internet's funniest satire site, The Babylon Bee. You get…
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Punk Cooking Site Starts Recipe With 1,000 Word Drunken Fight Story
BALTIMORE — New cooking website Death Comes Cooking will offer readers a refreshing take on the usual recipe/blog formula by…
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Juilliard Dorm Party Ruined By Douchebag Playing “Wonderwall” on Acoustic Oboe
NEW YORK — Freshman Chazz Baldwin utterly ruined a Juilliard dorm party last night with an impromptu, solo oboe rendition…
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Search Party Seeks Lil Nas X After No New “Old Town Road” Remixes in Over 48 Hours
ATLANTA – Worried family, friends, and fans formed a search party to find viral rapper Lil Nas X who was…
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Anthrax Also Surprised They’re Considered One of The Big Four
LEIPZIG, Germany — Thrash metal stalwarts Anthrax are “pretty surprised” to be considered one of thrash metal’s “legendary Big Four,”…
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It’s Time We End Gerrymandering, the Electoral College, and Grey’s Anatomy
I don't think there are many people out there who will tell you America has no problems to fix. Let's…
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Hipster Grandpa Prefers Joe Besser-Era Three Stooges
GREENSBURG, Pa. — 93-year-old grandfather and pretentious grouch Stan Kiska yet again defended his stance today that Joe Besser was…
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