COPENHAGEN — Prolific metal singer King Diamond hoped nobody would notice his eponymous band’s new concept album “Infernal Curse” followed the same plot as the 1993 children’s fantasy film “Hocus Pocus,” sources report.
“I entered the studio with a great idea for a story,” Diamond said sheepishly. “It dealt with three witches from the 17th century who were resurrected after a virgin lit a black candle on All Hallow’s Eve, and the efforts to stop them made by a man they had cursed into being an immortal black cat hundreds of years ago. It wasn’t until the entire album had been written and recorded that it came to my attention that this had already been done in a quirky Halloween movie in the early ‘90s. I was pushing 40 at the time, so how was I supposed to know? The only thing I can do now is go forward with the album and hope nobody notices the several references to Sarah Jessica Parker.”
King Diamond fan Patrick Clark the lyrical content of the new album sounded familiar.
“Hell yeah, I’m so pumped for a new album from the King!” Clark exclaimed as he opened his preorder of the CD. “It’s been 18 years, so I can’t wait to hear Andy Larocque’s signature neoclassical shredding and those classic falsetto vocals again. It’s also great that their albums are primarily concepts, because I love a good scary story. I was reading the Wiki on this one while waiting for it to arrive and it seems vaguely familiar to me. I can’t quite put my finger on it, but I felt like it was something I already knew. Eh, whatever. I’m sure it’ll come to me eventually.”
Metal culture expert Zara Daeng provided her opinion on Diamond’s oversight.
“This is actually more common than you’d think,” Daeng offered. “Heavy metal deals with notoriously dark and evil subject matter, and these themes tend to be much more prevalent in children’s movies than one would initially believe. Take a look at all the needless and preventable deaths of children in ‘Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory,’ or children being trapped in paintings until they die in ‘The Witches.’ It’s entirely understandable that a metal band could borrow these ideas without even realizing it.”
At press time, King admitted that he had omitted the cover of “I Put a Spell on You” from the record’s final tracklist, as he was worried it would give him away.