BANGOR, Maine. — Local community organizers recently announced the formation of a support group for music lovers who cannot stop listening to the same hour-long playlist, excited sources confirmed.
“It’s been a really underserved community, which I know all too well, as I struggle with this affliction myself,” explained support group co-founder Angela Bernabeo. “We can’t help it. We were born this way. We genuinely want to listen to more music, but we hear the siren call from our go-to playlist of 15 genuine bangers that came out when we were teenagers. It’s like a drug. We may only know three songs from our favorite band, but boy do we know every single word, guitar riff, inhale, and ‘oh yeah.’ But we’d like to evolve.”
The group enlisted the help of local DJ Jeremy Russell to expand their music exposure.
“I didn’t even know this condition existed. It broke my heart when they told me their stories. I knew I had to help. I looked at some of their playlists so I could figure out where they’re at. And honestly, they do slap. I mean, ‘Dance Yrself Clean’ into ‘Heart of Glass?’ That’s inspired,” said Russell. “But I was on a mission and had to stay focused. So I came up with a lesson plan that would help not only expose them to new music, but give them the tools to find it on their own.”
Musicophile Psychologist Daliya Klein offered some more insight on the under-researched phenomenon.
“It’s a surprisingly aggressive condition, not dissimilar to when small children go through a phase where they refuse to watch anything other than ‘Frozen’ for six months,” said Klein somewhat gravely. “However, it’s not impossible to overcome. They can be taught to let go of their musical security blankets. You just don’t want to overwhelm them with choices. You wouldn’t hand them the entire Prince catalog, for example. That might kill them. You have to start slow and be sure to incorporate a lot of positive reinforcement. It seems like this group is in good hands, and I expect many of them will make full recoveries.”
As of press time, It’s been reported that many of the group members, for their assignment to create a new playlist, simply reused their hyperfixation playlist from high school.