Collin Canning
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March 16, 2020
NEW YORK — Newly single and perfectly healthy man Dave Prost edited his Tinder bio yesterday, replacing his height with…
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KALAMAZOO, Mich. — Employees at a local marketing agency have confirmed that IT support technician Sye Monteleone was given his…
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John Merrifield
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March 16, 2020
A fifty-two percent tax. I can’t get that figure out of my head. Fifty-two percent. That’s almost half my income.…
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Dan Kozuh
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March 16, 2020
CHICAGO — Local executive Reginald Dixon sent a company-wide email from the security of his HEPA-filtered panic room moments ago…
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Jay Miller
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March 16, 2020
JACKSONVILLE, Fla. — Local gamer Steven Chen reportedly held up a d10 when asked to roll 8d8 necrotic damage, despite…
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Josh Fernandez
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March 16, 2020
Dudes! Summer is right around the corner, which means one thing: Hot hardcore shows and even more hot girls in…
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Dan Kozuh
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March 16, 2020
ATLANTA — The Center for Disease Control and Prevention released a statement earlier today warning citizens to abstain from creating…
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Jeremy Kaplowitz
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March 16, 2020
LOS ANGELES — J.J. Abrams has collaborated with authors on a new novelization of Star Wars: The Rise of Skywalker…
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Peter Woods
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March 15, 2020
WASHINGTON — Democratic Presidential hopeful Bernie Sanders accidentally told former Vice President Joe Biden “nice set” after tonight’s democratic debate,…
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Kevin Tit
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March 15, 2020
WASHINGTON — Democratic presidential frontrunner Joe. Biden allegedly checked in with former President Barack Obama ahead of an upcoming debate…
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