WASHINGTON — Speaker of the House Mike Johnson is reportedly getting really into online porn in an effort to relieve stress related to the looming…
BRATTLEBORO, Vt. — Fans of random video chat site Omegle were shocked to find their favorite method of meeting new online friends and seeing random…
WASHINGTON — Congress signed a last-minute funding measure to narrowly avoid a government shutdown today after a crowd gathered on Capitol Hill began chanting “one…
WILMINGTON, Del. — Newly vaccinated woman Denise Adame took advantage of her inoculated status late yesterday afternoon to step outside and take in the fresh,…
FORT WAYNE, Ind. — A friend whom you haven’t spoken to, texted, or shared an Instagram exchange with in the past 15 months put you…
SPRINGFIELD, Mass. — Staff and audience members at the newly reopened Cherry Pit reported a puzzling stench that may be as serious a health risk…
PHILADELPHIA — A group of local crust punks selflessly offered to help furloughed “bootlicking peons of the bloated and immoral federal government” yesterday by teaching…
WASHINGTON — Members of the newly-inaugurated 116th Congress of the United States are already facing a fresh challenge: rebooting a shutdown government in safe mode.…
WASHINGTON — Police officers broke up a rowdy Capitol Hill gathering early Saturday morning after receiving noise complaints from several neighbors, multiple sources report. “Shit,…