WALLINGFORD, Conn. — A blossoming romance wilted last night after Ty Baldwin, lead singer of local punk outfit Gashmaggot, called his new girlfriend by his…
Humanity has always feared the unknown, and in our hubris, we like to think that every creature on earth has already been discovered. Why then…
BATTLE CREEK, Mich. — Popular chip band Pringles announced a new ad campaign that will be built around the slogan, “It’s Okay to Fuck the…
Since 1891, the world has enjoyed Nabisco’s greatest and most fuckable creation, the Fig Newton cookie. Although we all have great memories of having a…
SACRAMENTO, Calif. — Spouses Josh and Natasha Taylor are reportedly in a losing battle for control of their sex swing — a purchase made to…
Has the passion drained from your bedroom? If so, you’ll want to spice things up with a mix of tried-and-true and adventurous sex positions. So…
We get it. You love Weezer almost as much as you love fucking. Trying to combine the best of both worlds in a steamy playlist?…
You’re back at your date’s place and if the natural order of things follows, a Baltimore Handshake lies wait in his immediate future. You should’ve…
IRVINE, Calif. — Local woman Jasmine Dreskel put a stop to her boyfriend’s sexual advances after noticing his custom lovemaking playlist curiously contained several Weird…
You don’t really hear much about groupies anymore. It seems the days of hooking up with dudes in bands and traveling with them across the…
As The Hard Times has gotten older, we’ve learned it’s important to reflect on lessons gained from past experiences. There’s one axiom that routinely resonates…
Relationships are tough, and with all the butt stuff going on now they’ve only gotten trickier. So, the sexologists at the Hard Times are here…
KING OF PRUSSIA, Pa. — A devoted fan of 2000s indie rock titans Yeah Yeah Yeahs is disrupting her sex life by insisting on reciting…
Morticia and Gomez Addams represent the perfect foil to the stereotypical sitcom couple: they’re always proud of their children, content with their family’s weirdness, and…
NEW YORK — Local Napalm Death fan Mark Dixon is reportedly feeling proud about the comment made by a woman after they engaged in nearly…