HAZLEHURST, Miss. — Indie horror movie “The Scary Place” is leaving primarily Republican audiences in freshly shitted-and pissed-in pants due to its terrifying, uneventful depictions…
MENDHAM TOWNSHIP, N.J. — Florida governor Ron DeSantis awoke the morning after a GOP presidential hopeful slumber party to discover the word “WOKE” written on…
LAREDO, Texas — Conservative Tanner Oakenson recently committed his life to destroying all forms of fictional child abuse invented by his favorite conservative podcasters and…
TALLAHASSEE, Fla. — Trevor Delphry, a self-described “crypto wrangler” and member of several known white supremacist groups, recently found himself unable to make death threats…
CALHOUN, Ga. — Irate Congresswoman Marjorie Taylor Greene began drafting articles of impeachment against staff at the Applebee’s restaurant when her order didn’t appear in…
WASHINGTON — Elected officials across the country promised they would spend the rest of Pride month drafting legislation targeted at making life a living hell…
NAMPA, Idaho — Conservative dad David Olmstead vowed to protect his children from drag shows as well as apparently play dates, dentist appointments, school events,…
BAKERSFIELD, Calif. — Self-proclaimed freethinker Terry Schuse added a 75th thin blue line sticker to his prized truck despite constantly ranting about government tyranny, confirmed…
PURGATORY — The afterlife faced a major shake-up after the Angel of Death was placed on administrative leave for his failure to kill GOP Senator…
NEW YORK — Republican Representative-elect George Santos is facing more scrutiny about his personal life after overwhelming evidence began to pile up refuting his claims…
FORT MEYERS, Fla. — Conservative advocacy group Bring Back America’s Heroes petitioned Marvel to update their roster of heroes with a character who is openly…
As a prominent member of the Republican party who receives a sizable check from the NRA biweekly just for doing their bidding without question, I’m…
Republicans, rejoice! We’ve stumbled upon some extremely juicy intel regarding your second favorite Biden to shit on. Is it Hunter’s laptop, you ask? Not a…