Dan Kozuh
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KENILWORTH, Ill. — Local metalhead Travis Garnette was dejected after failing to scare unsuspecting suburbanites while wandering around Lovelace Park…
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PITTSBURGH — American Eagle announced a series of ads highlighting how good black people are at playing basketball in an…
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HELL — Legendary professional wrestler, adulterer, and noted racist Hulk Hogan admitted he was confused as to why heaven seemed…
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Steve Packosky
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FORT MYERS, Fla. — Up and coming MAGA rapper Shilla Flo found his career reaching new heights after sexual harassment…
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Tim Sheard
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NEW YORK — Columbia University agreed to re-hire several prominent phrenologists in a bid to quell President Trump’s threat of…
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WASHINGTON — President Donald Trump debuted a completely new pronunciation of the holiday “Cinco De Mayo” while addressing local reporters…
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S.L. Neechski
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LOS ANGELES — Director and grizzled high school shop teacher look-alike Mel Gibson announced this week that his next project,…
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Steve Packosky
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Reality TV has to be one of the most prominent vices in society today, and many people tend to be…
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Matt Oriente
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BLUE ISLAND, Ill. — Reformed skinhead, public speaker, and talking head Tom Lupine is struggling to make ends meet as…
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Traye Holland
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LAS CRUCES, N.M. — Local man Gregory Cross had a distinct mullet that either made him seem like the most…
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