EUREKA, Calif. — A squirrel rapidly burying nuts in the ground in preparation for the winter is now better prepared for retirement than one local…
UNKNOWN — Survivors of Icelandair Flight 198, which crashed somewhere deep in the Arctic tundra last week, lauded vegan survivor Michael Hagen’s unwillingness to sacrifice…
RALEIGH, N.C — The recently defunded Raleigh Police Department has left officers with no choice but to cut their diminished stashes of cocaine, saved to…
PHILADELPHIA — Local anarchist punk band Hidden Rebellion discovered yesterday that every member of the group is actually an FBI plant, shadowy sources confirmed. “Our…