BARSTOW, Calif. — Metallica fans across the nation are feeling the pinch of the Trump economy and are having to…
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Steve Packosky
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CUPERTINO, Calif. — An AI-generated Metallica song titled “Am I Revenge Forgiven II?” sounded better than anything they’ve released over…
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Steve Packosky
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WASHINGTON — A recent poll among the nation’s random drunk dipshits at the bar have declared 1991’s “Enter Sandman” the…
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Dan Rice
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WASHINGTON — Secretary of Defense Pete Hegseth continues to adamantly deny multiple claims that he thought Metallica’s Kill ‘Em All…
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Steve Packosky
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DAYTON, Ohio — You settled for talking about Lamb of God with your coworker Nate Hollis after he heard you…
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Steve Packosky
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LOS ANGELES — Megadeth frontman Dave Mustaine suggested starting a “supergroup” with Metallica members James Hetfield, Lars Ulrich and Robert…
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Chris Bowen
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CORTLAND, N.Y. — Local forklift driver Kenny Avalon couldn't resist the urge to show you a Facebook video of a…
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Tyler Roland
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Hey, kid. I may not be a household name, but back in the day, I was one of the in-demand…
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Steve Packosky
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CHICAGO — Pregnant woman Janice Bonder found herself second-guessing her decision to bring new life into a world where popular…
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Ryan Danley
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WASHINGTON — Megadeth frontman Dave Mustaine is petitioning the Trump administration to institute a new law to prevent bands from…
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