Patrick Coyne
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TULSA, Okla. — The guitar that once belonged to legendary folk musician Woody Guthrie was seized by federal agents and…
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Tim Sheard
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WASHINGTON — Citizens across the nation were surprised to learn that the long-promised slow descent into fascism has rapidly accelerated…
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Ryan Dondero
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LOS ANGELES — Local tourist Daniela Harper was stunned to discover her Airbnb checkout instructions included what most would call…
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Matt Kennedy
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NASHVILLE — Rock and Roll Hall of Fame inductee Jack White officially banned fans from attending his concerts, citing a…
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Carson Kile
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CHICAGO — Local hardcore outfit Deep Cuts listed Hawaiian Gut Punch, another band with the exact same members, as a…
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Tim Graham
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UPPER MARLBORO, Md. — Wayne and Heidi Stevens intend to wait out the US’ burgeoning authoritarian regime by consuming an…
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Doug Kolic
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SELBYVILLE, Del. — A punk cadaver dog who was in the middle of searching for human remains from a historic…
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Mark Shady
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NEW YORK — Conservative cable network Fox News revealed that host Laura Ingraham’s dreams now officially counted as real news…
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Ben Sobieck
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CLEVELAND — Dave Dahl, best known as the face and founder of Dave’s Killer Bread, was inducted into the Rock…
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Carson Kile
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SAN DIEGO — A local venue uncovered a sting operation within their premises when a plainsclothes police officer blew his…
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