Ryan Dondero
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December 9, 2025
Alright, you fucking shitheads. You pieces of fucking garbage shit-fuck. You absolutely diabolical, fermented excuse for human shit-fuck excrement. Christ…
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Ben Friedman
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December 6, 2025
If there’s one thing we need more than ever this holiday season, it’s peace on earth. And there’s no better…
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Harry Valentine
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November 27, 2025
BIRMINGHAM, Ala. — The entire Peebles family was too preoccupied with their sports wagers to quarrel during Thanksgiving dinner, ending…
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Ben Sobieck
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June 19, 2025
WASHINGTON — President Donald Trump marked Juneteenth, the federal holiday created in 2021 commemorating the end of slavery in the…
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WASHINGTON — President Donald Trump debuted a completely new pronunciation of the holiday “Cinco De Mayo” while addressing local reporters…
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Ryan Danley
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April 20, 2025
NEW YORK — Local punk rocker and present-day messiah, Lenny “Resin” Jackson stunned the masses crashing at his squat by…
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Arielle Andreano
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April 20, 2025
It’s 4/20, and you’re probably thinking, “Who cares, I already smoke weed every day,” right? Well, what if I told…
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Chris Bowen
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December 25, 2024
ENDICOTT, N.Y. — Local man Jullian Karnes is hopeful for a war waged by the working class towards the wealthy…
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Steve Packosky
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December 24, 2024
SEATTLE – Christmas carolers and members of local black metal band Kirkeråte only reached three houses before succumbing to the…
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Nathan Kamal
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November 28, 2024
The holidays are a difficult time for many people, but especially for losers who no one loves or even thinks…
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