If you were aware of Philadelphia’s Atom and His Package in the late ‘90s/early 2000’s, it was either because you had a friend who liked Atom so much it was kind of annoying, or you were the annoying friend. If you’re aware of him now, it’s because you still have/are that friend, you’re aware of his more recent bands Armalite or Dead Best, or he was your high school chemistry teacher. After years of playing in local bands, Adam Goren (AKA Atom) started writing, recording, and releasing his own music on a collection of synthesizers and music sequencers (AKA His Package). Back when many punk solo musicians were just dudes singing punk songs while gorilla-strumming power chords on an acoustic guitar, Atom brought in electronic instrumentation and a level of humor constantly oscillating between immature and intelligent. Here we rank his full-length albums. You’re free to disagree, but you’ll have to return the TI-83 graphing calculator we loaned you freshman year.
5. Atom & His Package (AKA The First C.D.) (1997)
This album only ranks the worst because of how much the added guitar in later releases improves the sound. The exclusive use of sequencer and vocals on this album gives the music a lo-fi chiptune feel. The “Where Eagles Dare” Misfits cover still works well with this arrangement. Your friends might find the nasally vocals and lo-fi keyboard instrumentation annoying, but the songs rule, no matter how many wedgies you get for sneaking them into the party playlist. Need proof? The rock versions of “Avenger,” “He Kissed Me,” “Head (She’s Just A)”and “Atom and His Package” all rip when Atom re-records them as the “band” Lobster Mobster on “Making Love.”
Play it again: “Snowshoe BBQ”
Skip it: “Tim Allen Is Not Very Funny”
4. Making Love (1999)
The sound is still mostly sequencer/synthesizer driven, but there are a few guitar-driven tracks on this album that make you feel less nerdy for how much you enjoy it. “Hats Off to Halford” salutes Rob Halford for being an openly gay heavy metal musician, breaks into a Screeching Weasel chorus, and calls Slayer “Nazi fuckin’ pricks” for their use of Nazi iconography. Risking the anger of Slayer fans has to be one of the biggest I-don’t-give-a-shit-if-you-beat-me-up /standing-up-to-a-bully moves out there.
Play it again: “(Lord It’s Hard to Be Happy When You’re Not) Using the Metric System”
Skip it: “Bloody Lip,” but at 18 seconds long, you gotta be quick about it.
3. Attention! Blah Blah Blah (2003)
The final release is Atom’s most guitar-driven album. Sequencers are still present, but it sounds more like a keyboard rock band than a one-man sequencing act. As such, your enjoyment of this album is the least likely to get your lunch money stolen. “Mustache T.V.” informs us of the potential mental health benefits of putting scotch tape mustaches on the television, while “Dear Atom, You Do Not Want Children, Love, Atom.” explores his desire to have a child in spite of a letter he’d previously written to himself listing the reasons he didn’t “want no babies.” We’d rank this album higher, but every punk knows they’re bound to the convictions of their younger selves for life, no matter how unrealistic, arbitrary, or contradictory.
Play it again: “I’m Downright Amazed at What I Can Destroy With Just a Hammer”
Skip it: “Matt Werth Speaks”
2. Redefining Music (2001)
Guitar usage begins to catch up to the use of sequencers with this album, allowing them to complement each other. It’s still a good idea to watch out for wet willies if you put any of these songs on the road trip mix. “Shopping Spree” steals a chorus from Flagstaff’s The Dali Llamas, explaining in the verses that Atom actually wrote the song on tour, and they stole it from him. There’s also a song about using anarchy as an excuse for not picking up your trash, and another calling NFL team owner Daniel Snyder a cock for his decades-long refusal to change his team’s name from a racial slur.
Play it again: “Upside Down from Here”
Skip it: “Open Your Heart,” but only because it’s not the version that’s always playing at the grocery store
1. A Society of People Named Elihu (1997)
Atom’s second album still predominantly features sequencers in the arrangement, but it bends the beeps and boops toward a more traditional punk rock feel. The quality of the songwriting allows this album to surpass the later releases with a more mature sound. You’re still likely to get pantsed for listening to this one in public, but it’s worth it. It features tongue-in-cheek electronic covers of Fugazi’s “Waiting Room” and Youth of Today’s “Break Down the Walls.” It also features two birthday songs: one for your friends named Ralph and one that works for anyone. “No Way DNA,” recorded by Atom’s old band Fracture, closes out the album. “Punk Rock Academy” imagines a private high school for punk rockers that doesn’t suck while “Me and My Black Metal Friends” imagines befriending black metal bands in a way that doesn’t get you murdered.
Play it again: “Punk Rock Academy”
Skip it: “Sting Cannot Possibly Be the Same Guy Who Was in The Police”