Guy in Motörhead Shirt Sick of People Asking Him To Change Their Carburetors
LAKE FOREST, Ill. — Metalhead Darryl Washburn found himself getting exhausted by the constant requests from his friends and family to change their carburetors after he stepped out of the house in a Motörhead shirt, sources report. “Why i…
Cheater? My Ex-Boyfriend Started Dating Someone New
Don’t bother with handwriting analyses, enneagram tests, and aura readings. Don’t even worry about attachment theory or astrology forecasts. The only way to determine someone’s… <a href="https://thehardtimes.net/" class="font-medium" style="color: #3eb565;" onmouseover="this.style.color='#35a058'" onmouseout="this.style.color='#3eb565'">Read more nonsense</a>
Impossible! This Guy Brought a Bag of Clothes Straight to the Thrift Store Instead of Letting It Sit in His Trunk for Three Months
Experts Warn Resurgence of Nu-Metal Could Be a Precursor to Another Swing Revival
ANN ARBOR, Mich. — Experts at the University of Michigan Institute for Social Research have warned that the resurgence of nu-metal over the past few… <a href="https://thehardtimes.net/" class="font-medium" style="color: #3eb565;" onmouseover="this.style.color='#35a058'" onmouseout="this.style.color='#3eb565'">Continue this tale</a>
We Completely Made up This Interview With Dave Mustaine Because We Didn’t Want To Talk to Him
Alright, we can’t be blamed for this one. Would you be excited if you were assigned to conduct an interview with thrash metal’s most obnoxious… <a href="https://thehardtimes.net/" class="font-medium" style="color: #3eb565;" onmouseover="this.style.color='#35a058'" onmouseout="this.style.color='#3eb565'">Continue reading this gem</a>
Trump Is Boasting About an Alleged Land Strike in Venezuela — Here’s Why He Is Still a Pedophile
Undercover Cop Only One on Time to DIY Show
SAN DIEGO — A local venue uncovered a sting operation within their premises when a plainsclothes police officer blew his cover by being the only… <a href="https://thehardtimes.net/" class="font-medium" style="color: #3eb565;" onmouseover="this.style.color='#35a058'" onmouseout="this.style.color='#3eb565'">Get the full story</a>
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Experts Warn Resurgence of Nu-Metal Could Be a Precursor to Another Swing Revival
ANN ARBOR, Mich. — Experts at the University of Michigan Institute for Social Research have warned that the resurgence of nu-metal over the past few years could be a precursor to a renewed nationwide interest in swing music not seen…
Crust Punk Sets Sail for Fabled Promised Land of Pacific Garbage Patch
SAN FRANCISCO — A local crust punk announced plans to set sail on open waters…
Woody Guthrie’s Guitar Detained by Masked Federal Agents
TULSA, Okla. — The guitar that once belonged to legendary folk musician Woody Guthrie was…
Jack White Bans Fans From Concerts
NASHVILLE — Rock and Roll Hall of Fame inductee Jack White officially banned fans from…
Hardcore Band Cites Different Band With Same Members as Major Influence
CHICAGO — Local hardcore outfit Deep Cuts listed Hawaiian Gut Punch, another band with the…
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The Next Alex Jones? This Parrot Learned To Say “Deep State”
Does anyone want to buy a parrot? He’s a beautiful blue and yellow macaw, very well-behaved, enjoys grapes, and, unfortunately,…
“Our Story” Section of Wedding Website Doubles as Historical Fiction
NASHVILLE, Tenn. — Avid readers of TheKnot.com report that a couple’s “Our Story” section on their personal wedding website, where…
Democrats Placated By Decision to Rename Alligator Alcatraz the “Ruth Bader Ginsburg Memorial Detention Facility”
WASHINGTON — Congressional Democrats achieved “yet another satisfying moral victory” against the GOP by convincing their Republican counterparts to rename…
Opinion: I Have a Substack Because I’m an Expert, and I’m an Expert Because I Have a Substack
If you’re looking for true expertise, then look no further than Substack. I know this because I have my own…