PROVIDENCE, R.I. — Local man Mick Lovell attempted to weave the phrase “late-stage capitalism” into casual conversation, hoping it would make his friends respect his…
You may think of us as just piddling music journalists, but we here at the Hard Times are hard-hitting investigative reporters as well. When we…
LOS ANGELES — Local punk Corbin Stefanski’s weakening urine stream is severely limiting his ability to clean his toilet, according to several sources familiar with…
Spring is in full swing, and for the few days that aren’t ravaged by devastating storms or wild temperature fluctuations, it’s been amazing. Still, you’ve…
WASHINGTON — President Donald Trump made the decision to replace the country’s highest military decoration for valor in action with the grand prize from ‘90s…
A recent study revealed that only five percent of U.S. adults suffer from a mood disorder, but James Young, a local martyr, claims every single…
GLENS FALLS, N.Y. — A salesman for music gear retailer Sweetwater appeared at the funeral for Richie Andrews, a customer who purchased an overdrive pedal…
LONG BRANCH, N.J. — President Trump ordered a federal raid of the dreams and visions of Wendy, the female character from “Born to Run,” in…
SANTA CLARITA, Calif. — Noted polyamorous couple Zheff Macguire and Morgy Clementine were spotted frantically rearranging their Funko Pop collection ahead of their visiting third,…
Have you ever witnessed a stranger struggling and ignored them because it wasn’t your business? Whether it’s because of selfishness or just being self-conscious, it’s…
SEATTLE — A casual dinner amongst old friends at The Prissy Duck took a turn Friday night when apparent nouveau riche Luke Moore encouraged everyone…
CHICAGO — Legions of punk fans are bracing for disappointment over the exclusion of a reunion set from beloved ska-punk band Operation Ivy during the…
HOUSTON — Local conservative Kyle Edwards found himself hoping female-centric music festival Lilith Fair is revived so he can complain about it, sources report. “I…
Throughout the ‘90s and early 2000s, audiences simply could not believe their ears when ax-man Tom Morello plugged in his six-string. The sounds, otherworldly. Alien…
SAN DIEGO — A rare koala discovered at the San Diego Zoo defied its species’ reputation for being sedentary and lethargic and became an uncontrollable…