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Opinion: Man, We Haven’t Talked in Forever, Also Wouldn’t It Be Great To Be Your Own Boss?!

Hey bro, what’s goin’ on? I can’t believe we graduated high school fifteen years ago, seems like yesterday we were in Biology class. Do you still like music? Cool Cool. So, how is life Know what I’ve been thinking about lately? How great it would be to be my own boss!

Remember that time we drank beers on the football field and it felt like we had our whole lives ahead of us? How would you like to have that feeling every day of your life? This isn’t some Ponzi scheme or paranoid fraud… This is an opportunity to take control and write your own destiny for only $500. Well, the first payment is $500.

I know that sounds like a lot but what if I told you that can be turned into $500,000 in just one year. At least that’s what I’m told. The guy who started this company now owns an island and I will too once I buy all the materials and take the class to become a certified Life Broker.

I know we haven’t spoken since college but I have been so busy manifesting the sacred truth that I hardly have time for silly things like social media. I am too busy living a real life. So busy with vacations, and steak dinners, and hot women. That’s why I haven’t posted any photos of that stuff on Instagram.

Are your parents still pretty rich? How would they like to retire early? If you buy one training session from me, then you can turn around and sign them up as well. That is how easy this works. And, no, this is totally different than when I tried to sell you knives senior year. You know what they say, you have to spend money to make money and I have spent a lot of money!

Oh, also, can I crash on your couch for the weekend?