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Opinion: ACAB! Except Robocop

There’s a simple truth out here in the real world. ACAB! All. Cops. Are. Bastards! Point blank period. And when we say “all” we mean ALL cops. Your uncle that’s a cop? Bastard. The nice cop at the coffee shop? Bastard. There is, however, one exception.

Officer Murphy was ruthlessly slaughtered by a gang of brutal thugs only to be resurrected by a greedy corporation into a half human, half robot, all cop cyborg. Though initially a slave to the Prime Directives of corporate America, this officer came to exemplify the strength of humanity against corporate greed and society’s brutal architecture, reclaiming and redefining his own identity in the process. His name is Robocop, and he is dope as fuck.

The police force is nothing more than a government sanctioned gang. They are the armed enforcement of the status quo, harbingers of the oppressive values our society was built on. They are the wall between the wealthy and the marginalized poor. But there was this time that Robocop walked right up to a woman and offered to contact a rape crisis center for her straight up after he shot this dude’s dick off, and that ruled.

I’m tired of hearing there are just a few “bad apples” giving good cops a bad name. These are people with guns that have been given a license to kill. You don’t get to make mistakes. A cop chooses to be a cop. A cop chooses to uphold unjust laws. A cop chooses to not intervene in police misconduct and a cop chooses to have their fellow cop’s back when they lie and murder innocent people. All bastard moves.

But there was this one time that Robocop did a solo no warrant raid on a drug producing facility that was super badass. He single handedly killed probably a dozen henchman. Then he found notorious scumbag Clarence Bodiger and threw him through plate glass windows until he got the information he needed. I gotta tell you that shit hypes me up.

If the police want to shed the moniker of “bastards” they need to make major changes. They will have to make extreme efforts to improve relations with marginalized and oppressed communities. They need to enact an anti-racism and bias program that has real accountability. They need to redefine the parameters for use of force. Police are given the utmost trust in our society and needed to be held the highest of standards. The archaic policies that allow for police brutality need to be taken out like Robocop took out Dick Jones. Shot through the window of a high rise office building and sent it to its death. Only then can we, as a society, proudly state that we are Murphy, Officer Murphy.