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Slacker Accidentally Aces History and Science Exams After Attending They Might Be Giants Show Last Night

OAKLAND, Calif. — Perpetual “lost cause” Kip “The Drip” Dellaher miraculously passed his science and history exams today after simply attending last night’s They Might Be Giants concert, astonished sources confirmed.

“I just happened to go with a friend after weighing my options of either studying for my tests, or going to a kickass rock show. And if you’re hip to the Drip, heh, you know which one he went with!” drawled Dellaher, as he initiated a high five that he refused to let leave hanging. “I guess the content of their music just sorta slurped its way into the belly of my brain, you know through, what’s it called, ‘Osmosis Jones.’ Because the next day I knew all this junk about Istanbul and Robot Parades, and was just ready to take on whatever my professors threw at me.”

They Might Be Giants co-founder John Flansburgh shed some essential light on the setlist in question.

“After playing together with Linnell for 40 years, we’ve got so many songs to curate our sets, so I like to keep it interesting. Last night, as kind of an in-joke with the rest of the band, we did an all academic set. I’m talking ‘James K. Polk’ into ‘Why Does the Sun Shine?’ into ‘The Mesopotamians.’ That kid had no choice but to pass with flying colors with us by his side,” said Flansburgh. “I only hope he didn’t have a syntax test in his English class, too. Because we played ‘Don’t Let’s Start’ as an encore, and ‘Won’t He’ll Pass’ if THAT gets stuck in his head.”

Science professor Sasha Anatole regrets allowing her fandom to dictate her exam content.

“Of course I’m a TMBG fan, EVERY professor is a TMBG fan. So when I saw my worst student at the concert I was thrown for a loop. I started realizing that everything we were hearing would be on the test tomorrow,” said a remorseful Anatole. “Sure enough, the damn Drip flew through that Scantron like he’s only previously flown through Cracked Magazine. I thought I’d finally be rid of him, maybe get him tossed back a few grades even! But now he’ll probably join my extracurriculars. Curse those Johns and their catchy, experimental rock!”

At press time, Dellaher learned the hard way that, as a newfound “They Might Be Giants guy,” he will henceforth now always fail Phys Ed.