BAKERSFIELD, Calif. — The music scene was left reeling yesterday after a contingency of neoliberal punks suggested meeting Nazi punks halfway on a multitude of…
MIAMI — Legendary punk icon and notoriously topless frontman Iggy Pop turned heads the other day after wearing a shirt in the pool at a…
HARRISBURG, Penn. — Local human disaster Jason Melvin recently managed to pull a complete 180 in every aspect of his previously pointless existence with the…
GLENSIDE, Pa. — Pennsylvania senate candidate John Fetterman vows to support universal healthcare for scene veterans, old heads, and all the real motherfuckers in the…
MEMPHIS, Tenn. — New Jersey-based punk, and massive acid enthusiast, Lionel “Tabby” Winnet is reportedly “confused but going with it” upon finding himself at bat…
PHOENIX, AZ – Local bassist Winston Crowe of punk band Sloppyfoot hit the gym to begin a new head nod training regimen which he hopes…
BOSTON — Local guitarist Lacey Buntz successfully replaced the low E string on her acoustic guitar using a thick, incredibly long, jet-black, chin hair she…
PITTSBURGH – A prototype driverless car, manufactured by local technology start-up High Drive, crashed into a telephone pole and was issued a DUI on its…
PITTSBURGH – Local crust punk Connor Thompson openly rejects the use of normal paper coffee filters and instead uses a dingy, faded Discharge patch off…
In Green Day’s song “Longview,” singer Billy Joe Armstrong makes reference to masturbating until it loses its fun. We decided to try this out and,…
BLOOMINGTON, Ind. – Blitz Greg Bop, a rescue dog belonging to local punk Jimmy McCallister, significantly upgraded his dietary lifestyle since running away from home…
LONDON — Notorious London street punk band The Ruckus Mutts were forced to abandon over fifty percent of their setlist following the announcement of Prime…
HUNTINGTON BEACH, Calif. — Veteran crowd surfer Eddie Wang openly mocked crowd boogie boarder Erik Denton after riding the audience at a Huntington Beach punk…
SACRAMENTO — Young Joey Hopkins was forced to listen to volumes five, seven, and eight of his father’s Epitaph Punk-O-Rama compilation collection in their entirety…
PHILO, Ohio — Local 8th grader and “true” punk Tim Krenalka reportedly knows his geography pretty well, but refuses to participate in any lesson which…