MANHATTAN BEACH, Calif. — Punk band Descendents announced a new album titled “Milo Moves to Canada” in response to Donald Trump’s election victory, which is…
U.S. ROUTE 49, Miss. — Local punk and guitar virtuoso Drennen Boydell decided to sell his soul to the Devil in exchange for getting worse…
THE LABYRINTH — Residents of a crust punk house were seemingly unaware that they were inhabiting the Cenobite dimension, terrified sources confirmed. “I woke up…
NASHVILLE, Tenn. — Continuous go-getter Henry Rollins recently employed the services of a TaskRabbit professional to ask him questions about his varied projects and interests…
LOS ANGELES — A shocking new report by citizen journalist/unemployed man Gary Russo claims that skateboarder Tony Hawk did not actually write “Superman by Goldfinger,”…
WASHINGTON — Ian MacKaye was recently spotted scrambling down a block, knocking over multiple children and old people who were in his path, in a…
LOS ANGELES — Former Hellcat Records intern Alexis Merz revealed that the entire band roster consists of The Interrupters dressed in variously colored Fred Perry…
WINNIPEG, Manitoba — Canadian political punk rockers Propagandhi admitted that they are struggling to write new songs after the death of their creative muse Henry…
ANN ARBOR, Mich. — The group of gutter punks that loiters near 5th and Huron employs many invented terms for states of impoverishment, sources hurrying…
CHICAGO — Former Blink-182 guitarist Matt Skiba was seen staring out a window on a rainy day this past week while wondering if Mark Hoppus…
LOS ANGELES — Legendary AFI frontman Davey Havok was overheard screaming “Do you know who I am?” at Harold’s Haunted Hayride employees while being forcibly…
WASHINGTON — Legendary post-hardcore band Fugazi announced they would be canceling their reunion tour because interest in the shows has been too high, confirmed sources…
MOORESVILLE, N.C. — Lowe’s executives announced plans to introduce a 14-foot tall Glenn Danzig ahead of the upcoming Halloween season, confirmed multiple sources following a…
LITTLETON, N.H. — A recent release of a limited edition “GG Allin Chia Pet” elicited a mixed reaction due to the rather unconventional set of…
20 Misfits Songs That Will Get You Kicked Out of the PTA for Playing at a Children’s Halloween Party
20 Misfits Songs That Will Get You Kicked Out of the PTA for Playing at a Children’s Halloween Party
Well, it’s that spooky time of year again. Halloween is almost here and now that you’re a parent with young children it’s time for the…