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Punk Drummer Taking Way Too Long To Set Up Two-Piece Kit

DAYTON, Ohio — The drummer of local punk band Vulture Attack took a “confusingly inappropriate” amount of time last night to set up his minimalist drum kit for their show, according to bewildered witnesses.

“I always think it’s cool when a drummer has a small kit,” said Ellen Steen, who attended the show at Hardvark’s. “But I don’t really understand why it took him a half-hour to set it up — he moved that concrete brick, like, a dozen times, then kept sitting down and playing for a second before getting up and moving stuff around again. Seems like a lot of work for a band that plays six songs that all sound the same.”

Drummer Todd Treadwell offered several reasons for using a minimal drum set.

“I just like the simplicity of a snare and a kick,” said Treadwell. “Just keep it simple, you know? Also, I traded the rest of my kit for a tattoo… and I never figured out how to tune my toms. And there’s really not enough room in the van for that many drums, either. But, yeah… basically, I just really prefer to just keep it simple up there. For the music.”

However, Treadwell’s bandmates are increasingly upset by his meticulousness.

“It took him so long, they cut half of our 30-minute set,” claimed frontman Sean Bussler after the show, while the rest of the band hauled equipment back to the van. “This happens every time. I mean, it’s fine. Really. We only have 12 minutes of music. But it bothers me on principle.”

At press time, Treadwell had taken 25 minutes to give a touring band directions to a Taco Bell located a mere 10 blocks away.

Photo by Kat Chish.

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