BOSTON — Local deathcore fan Toby Branstein decided to bust out his finest carabiner keychain for the upcoming special Red Chord show, confirmed sources who…
CHICAGO — Local metalhead and avid drinker Stephen Mullins realized he needs to donate increasingly larger amounts of blood and plasma just to achieve the…
SYRACUSE, N.Y. — Heavy metal fan and the lone adult female in the local metal scene, Kara Morgan, unintentionally became a maternal figure to nearly…
PITTSBURGH – Aging metalhead Derek Vance made the mistake of trying to slip into his wedding battle vest to celebrate his 25 year anniversary with…
TAMPA, Fla. — Attendees at a local death metal show Saturday night were leery of a suspicious man wearing a Six Feet Under t-shirt, who…
LANSING, Mich. — The coat check at the Iron Smelt Theatre was filled almost exclusively with capes during fantasy metal legends Polarian Amulet show, event…
SEATTLE — Members of local grindcore band Gestation Crate were unable to settle a debate about which 473 songs of theirs should belong on their…
HOUSTON — Merch guy for the heavy metal band Beast of Damocles Eric Jennie provides an extra service for any customers who want the sleeves…
TORONTO — Family and friends of local man Neil Dupont are growing increasingly concerned for his health after showing signs that his alcohol problem has…
FORT MYERS, Fla. — Conservative metalhead Edgar Hardy insisted that the “woke” interpretation of what life was like as a Powerslave in ancient Egypt is…
DETROIT — Little Caesars Arena DJ Richard King is waiting for the perfect moment to play “Welcome to the Jungle” during a Detroit Red Wings…
BANGLADESH — Representatives overseeing child employees of the most successful garment factory in the country reported the illegal laborers can’t keep up with the production…
ROCHESTER, N.Y. — Occult rockers Ghost performed their entire show with wastebaskets from a local Marriott on their heads after TSA lost their trademark masks…
BALTIMORE — Local death metal band Infested Remains landed in hot water after fans criticized the AI-generated corpse on their latest album’s artwork for looking…
LOS ANGELES — Longtime Slayer guitarist Kerry King is reportedly scouring tabs on UltimateGuitar.com in a sudden attempt to relearn some of his most famous…