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Hardcore Band Reunion Show Ruined After Singer Loses His Breath 20 Seconds Into First Song

PHILADELPHIA — Hardcore band X Conviction Of Truth X had their first reunion show in over fifteen years ruined after their singer lost his breath twenty seconds into the first song, sources who wished they’d just stayed home and fallen asleep on the couch at 9:30 confirmed.

“I was super pumped to play this show and went balls out on our first song ‘Deceptionocracy’ but before I knew it I couldn’t get the words out at all,” said vocalist Troy Billings. “When we played our last show I was twenty-three years old but now I’m almost forty. Is there something that happens to you when you get older and you sit at a desk job all day and you make no attempt to exercise that makes it so you can’t… sorry, I’m still catching my breath.”

Showgoers noticed the trouble Billings was having on stage and some even rushed in to help singalong but suffered the same shortness of breath.

“Once I saw Troy was only able to speak some of the lyrics to the first song I thought I should jump up on stage for big gang vocal breakdown part where it goes ‘Your system is a LIE!’ but by the time I got up there my heart was beating fast and my legs felt shaky and it just came out like ‘yerrshishtemizzaluh’,” said Kyle Willard, 42. “I played it off pretty cool though and just stood on the side of the stage pretending to singalong while I caught my breath. I was on the verge of passing out, but thankfully the band took about seven minutes to start the next song and I was able to chug some water and find a chair.”

Dan Smith, who books most of the local hardcore shows under the name “HATE FUCK LIFE”, says this has become a common problem when he books reunion shows for older bands.

“I see this all the time with bands that haven’t played since the early 2000s. Everyone runs out of steam quick and by the fourth or fifth song both the bands and the crowd look like they’re all at Death’s door,” said Smith. “I think for the next reunion show I book I’m just going to have each band play one song and be done with it. That way everyone can still say they saw their favorite band from when they were young, post the one good ten seconds of the show to Instagram, and we can all go home at a reasonable hour.”

At press time, X Conviction Of Truth X announced they were working on a new album but that practice hasn’t been going well since they mostly just sit around looking at their phones.