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Facebook User “Maybe” Attending 67 Shows This Weekend

THE COUCH — Local punk rock fan and avid Facebook user Jeremy Germ announced today that he is “maybe” attending 67 shows this weekend.

Despite hitting “maybe” on 67 hardcore shows, metal fests, indie concerts, rock ‘n’ roll gigs, acoustic sessions, and intimate parties he wasn’t invited to, sources close to the situation say it is most likely Germ will most likely just stay home and watch Netflix.

“You never know, though,” Germ said. “Someone on the event page might be able to give me a ride.”

Related: PC Punk Loses Last Facebook Friend

When asked if he felt like it was even possible to attend that many events in one weekend, Germ was blunt.

“Maybe,” he said. “Just, maybe.”