ATLANTA — Authorities were called to the State Farm Arena this evening to respond to what eyewitnesses report as a twirling session at a Stevie Nicks concert that went “horribly wrong” and left at least 30 people with a range of injuries, confirmed sources who haven’t been able to listen to “Rumors” since.
“At this time none of the injuries appear to be life threatening,” said Gloria Bernice, a spokesperson for the Atlanta Fire Department. “We’re still piecing together what happened, but we believe that during a rendition of ‘Landslide’ Ms. Nicks began to twirl and subsequently lost control of her body and pirouetted into the crowd. In addition to those whacked by her flailing arms, others were injured in the rush to get out of the path of the out of control singer. We’re still investigating the incident, but, contrary to the rumors online, there is no evidence that this was the result of witchcraft.
Eyewitnesses at the concert described the scene as “chaotic” and “confusing” and with many only narrowly escaping injury.
“It all just happened so fast, I’m still trying to process the whole thing,” reported Heather Campbell. “Everything seemed fine but then I noticed that she kept twirling faster and faster and I began to worry that something might be wrong. Before I knew it, there was this mass of scarves flying everywhere towards the front of the crowd and people were running away. The sound of tambourine as it whizzed by my head still haunts me.”
Nicks was quick to issue an apology, calling the incident an unfortunate accident.
“I am truly sorry for the injuries and trauma that I may have caused anyone,” said the former Fleetwood Mac member. “Please know that this was a freak accident and that people can continue to come to my shows and feel safe. I have had a chance to visit many of those injured and I am committed to helping out with their medical costs and any future therapy they may need by giving them a credit on tickets to my future shows.”
At press time, authorities said that this event, while tragic, still pales in comparison to the 2009 Cupid Shuffle that destroyed several blocks of Downtown Atlanta.