Do you ever get the feeling you are the lead vocalist of the popular hardcore band Terror?
You are not alone. Many people aren’t sure if they’re Scott Vogel or just a regular person who is not a hardcore frontman at all. If you’ve ever wondered if you are the charismatic frontman of a highly influential hardcore band, these seven signs should clear things up for you.
1. You answer to Scott Vogel and you are credited as the vocalist for the band Terror on all releases. Dead giveaway.
2. You have been in the band known as “Terror” most of your adult life, primarily doing vocals for the band. The catch is, your name is Scott. Your friends call you “Scott Vogel” for short.
3. When you write checks, you write “Scott Vogel” on the “name” line, and “for stage dives” in the “memo” line. Also, you do screams for Terror the band. Still not sure? Continue reading.
4. Pull out your wallet and look at your I.D. Does it say “Scott Vogel of the band Terror” anywhere on it? Is your address “Stage Dive Town?” Because that can only mean one thing: you’re Scott Vogel and your employment is Terror, full time.
5. On the liner notes of your album Lowest of the Low you are listed as the vocalist, and that happens to be for the band known as Terror. Also, if someone shouts, “SCOTT!” from across a venue, you will turn to look for who said it, because that’s your name.
6. If someone had a pile of birth certificates and told you to pick yours out of the pile, you’d pick the one that said “Scott Vogel.” And your prize for finding it would be to do singing for Terror, which you agree to do, for a good chunk of your life.
Still reading? By this point you should have narrowed the possible choices down to “Scott Vogel” or “Someone Else” But if you’re still not sure, this final sign should settle things.
7. Look in the mirror. Are you Scott Vogel? Because if so, that’s your name, and you better start singing for Terror, because that’s the band you are the frontman of and you probably have a European tour you should be on right now. Also, your last name means “bird” in German. Just a little fun tidbit about your name.