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REPORT: Majority of Petey Sketches Where He Plays 5-6 Characters Not Filmed and Performed at Full Volume As He Walks Down Street 

LOS ANGELES — A rather hilarious Petey sketch where he plays at least a half dozen characters was reportedly not filmed and performed at full volume as Petey walked down the street, concerned friends and family confirmed.

“Before becoming big on TikTok Petey was days away from moving home where we could help him get better. Los Angeles hasn’t been good for him. I call him and sometimes I’m talking to him and sometimes I’m talking to ‘Puff Sullivan,’” one friend, who asked to remain anonymous when speaking about the struggles Petey is going through, said. “He can’t help himself. One of his neighbors actually uploaded some of his earlier videos because they thought it was funny. It’s not. We need Petey to come home.”

According to experts, Petey isn’t alone in his struggles.

“Over half the individuals on TikTok are clinically insane. They sit in their car, talking to nobody for hours on end instead of getting treatment,” Joyce Heidberg, head of psychology at UCLA, said. “The other half are just annoying. Those are the people that can fuck right off. I watch some of that slop and think ‘Who is this for? I’d rather be hit by a train than watch another second of this.’”

At press time, Los Angeles police officers detained Petey and noted in their report the sketch Petey was working on was quite funny.