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Neighborhood in Desperate Need of Grocery Store Guesses It’s Fine With Another Pop-up Art Exhibit

SACRAMENTO, Calif. — The Robles Park neighborhood will soon host a temporary art installation, an event largely received as “…fine, I guess, but more food access would be nice, too,” sources close to the up-and-coming area confirmed.

“It’s cool that people notice me, but I can’t support those who live here with half-assed photo-booths disguised as ‘thoughtful meditations on media,’” the neighborhood said. “If I’m lucky, maybe a few 20-somethings will do ironic rap squats in me and remember to tag the location before they post on Instagram.”

Although a grocery store is high on the neighborhood’s wish-list of improvements, plenty of additional suggestions over a temporary art installation were offered — all of which have been unmet as well.

“So, I’m fine with art… but we could really use better job prospects, way fewer upscale coffee shops, more affordable housing, funds for schools… did I already say the thing about fewer upscale coffee shops?” said local resident and Robles Park Neighborhood Association member Sarita Cruz. “I can’t even walk to the bus stop without tripping over some chalkboard sign telling me to ‘espresso yo’self.’”

When reached for comment, Jordan Langley, lead organizer of the Cat Howl Pop-Up installation, immediately insisted any similarity between his event and that of Santa Fe’s Meow Wolf attraction is purely coincidental — and went on to accuse the neighborhood of “gaslighting” him.

“God, it is being so dramatic! We’re not just providing an enriching, immersive arts experience to the neighborhood — we’ll have food trucks, too,” Langley said. “We’re feeding souls and stomachs. As long as people pay the $20 entrance fee, they can buy all the wood-fired pizza and vegan poke they could want. What neighborhood doesn’t need that?”

Despite the installation, the neighborhood is doing its best to remain optimistic.

“When you’ve been around as long as I have, you learn to find the silver lining,” the neighborhood explained. “I know once my residents see this total lack of self-awareness cynically marketed as ‘art,’ they’ll roast the shit out of it on social media. So that’s something, I guess.”