Dan Kozuh
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BRAINTREE, Mass. — A leak revealed that local punk band We Wear the Mask only keeps their second guitarist, Davey…
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Carson Kile
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LOS ANGELES — An astounding display of skill and expertise was observed today as local punk sommelier Evan Weaver correctly…
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Matt McInerney
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WINNIPEG, Manitoba — Local Weakerthans fan Graham Neal is reportedly unable to extend his performance in the bedroom by using…
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Ben Friedman
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DEERFIELD, Ill. - Walgreens announced today that it would be closing 1,200 retail stores after unsuccessfully implementing a policy of…
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Tim Sheard
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CEDAR RAPIDS, Iowa — Local man Vincent Metcalf quit his longtime dream of becoming a con artist to become a…
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Tim Sheard
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BOCA CHICA, Texas — Local businessman and investor Elon Musk presented his clear vision of the future where humanity thought…
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Adam Frost-Venrick
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NEW ORLEANS — A weekly Alcoholics Anonymous Meeting was recently attended by all three former members of the band Cyanide…
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Ben Friedman
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OMAHA, Neb. — HR generalist Annie Washington claims she already knows who within the company is going to be fired…
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Tim Graham
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LOS ANGELES — Garment company JNCO says renewed interest in their extra-wide legged jeans could result in a devastating shortage…
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Dan Kozuh
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Remember the good ol’ days of the early 2000s, when we were blissfully ignorant of social media and the internet…
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