Charles Bill
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TOPEKA, Kan. – Local boring millennial Harley Shun admitted that he is horribly embarrassed by his drunken antics which made…
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Travis Tack
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CARMEL, Ind. — Wells Fargo Bank announced the acquisition of a quaint two bedroom to settle down and raise little…
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Carson Kile
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VANCOUVER, British Columbia — Legendary music journalist Nardwuar was gently but sternly escorted out of a gentlemen's club last night…
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Julien Perez
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ELK GROVE, Calif. — Local man Ron Gibbard finally added buddy Jake Monroe to his contact list on his phone…
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Rob Ryder
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CHICAGO — Guitarist and exhausted activist Tom Morello faxed in his protest of the Democratic National Convention report disappointed political…
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Jose Balderas
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GLENDALE, Calif. — Self-professed 36-year-old “film connoisseur” Bobby Colina’s bad day was salvaged by an accidental Good Samaritan calling him…
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Dan Kozuh
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SAN FRANCISCO — Users on the social media platform Threads were recently abuzz with news that President Joe Biden might…
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Ben Friedman
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MINNEAPOLIS — Local man Greg Johannssen claims it’s too early in the year for Starbucks to release pumpkin spice flavored…
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Bobby Korec
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Someone has to say it: Dan Schneider is a piece of shit. He has recently faced significant media coverage and…
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Ben Friedman
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PORTLAND, Ore. — Local new age lifestyle hippie Moon Sage was forced to reconsider his family’s eating habits after learning…
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