Jason Clemence
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AUSTIN, Texas — Members of the instrumental post-rock band Explosions in the Sky condemned Hollywood’s current lack of emotionally resonant…
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Tim Sheard
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CHICAGO — United Airlines unveiled a new ad campaign that will emphasize the length of time that’s passed since the…
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WILMINGTON, Del. — Former President Joe Biden announced he is embarking on a new project designed to destroy the homes…
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WASHINGTON — The collection of white dorks that make up Elon Musk's entourage asked for a significant raise if they…
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Jordan Liffengren
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WASHINGTON — Famed Harry Potter villain Lord Voldemort was spotted at Donald Trump’s Presidential Inauguration, hiding under First Lady Melania…
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Steve Packosky
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WASHINGTON — White House Deputy Chief of Staff Stephen Miller capped off his day by rewatching the death of horse…
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Trevor Graham
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BENTONVILLE, Ark. — Local naive man Collin Blakeman blissfully contributed savings to his 401(k) despite the fact there is no…
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Doug Kolic
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NEW YORK — Ahmir K. Thompson, better known as Questlove from the band The Roots, recently questioned what kind of…
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Matt Husser
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STARBASE, Texas — A contractor working on Elon Musk's new Texas mega-mansion revealed that every book on the billionaire's shelf…
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Jason Clemence
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Earlier this week, iconic American filmmaker David Lynch died, leaving behind an astonishingly brilliant and bizarre body of work that…
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