Like Elon Musk, I’m a doer, not a talker. So when I noticed the online attacks against my hero started to ramp up, I knew I could no longer stand idly by, which is why I quit my job and left my wife to defend Elon online full-time.
Of course, I’ve been a white knight to Elon on Twitter and Reddit for years. I can’t tell you how many late nights I’ve argued with strangers on the internet trying to slander his good reputation. But life kept getting in the way. I’d keep getting pulled into Zoom meetings just as I was about to epically destroy far-left haters presenting what some consider “factual, valid criticism of Musk” as if such a thing exists.
The straw that broke the camel’s back was when my wife took my phone out of my hands just as I was about to tweet a rage-face comic at some supposed engineer criticizing the new Tesla models because “I was making us later for dinner with her parents” or something like that. I knew then that if I was going to get serious about this work, I had to remove all unnecessary distractions from my life; so I told my boss to shove it, packed my bags, and left my wife.
Not only is defending everything that Musk does the correct and moral thing to do, but it’s also a long-term investment. If you think he doesn’t notice us, his grand army of white knights, you’re wrong. And one day we will reap the rewards. Everyone thought I was crazy for quitting a job I could have gotten a full pension from, but that’s not going to matter once I’m living on the Mars colony.
Hell, I bet if I work really hard, Elon will waive my $8 monthly Twitter verification fee. I’ll of course be donating it to SpaceX though.
Sure, I miss my wife. Sometimes I get lonely being in this motel room I’ve been living in, but the truth is I’ve been so busy scrolling Reddit comments in search of Elon haters that I’ve barely noticed she’s gone. This was inevitable anyways. We’ve grown apart over the years. Anytime I’d show her a meme Elon posted, or try to tell her about one of his epic trolls, she wasn’t interested. It was clear that our values no longer aligned.
Elon hasn’t responded to any of the screenshots I’ve sent showing him the libtards I’ve destroyed, but that’s just because he’s been so busy with the Twitter deal. He notices me, and when he’s not so busy he’ll reply and tell me that I’m a good boy. He will. I just know he will.