Reddit is a place to learn about a variety of hobbies, immerse yourself in new subcultures, and get lectured by mods and bots alike for not understanding the cryptic, hidden rules of a given subreddit buried in some sidebar. It sucks, which is why we only spend about 10 hours there per day.
No subreddit is more infuriating than r/punk. It reads mostly like pre-tween children asking their older siblings for permission to listen to new bands and wear clothing. After some investigation, it turns out that’s exactly who is posting these questions. And it’s all the same kid making burner accounts! We sat down with 10-year-old Timmy Lignelli to find out what his fucking deal is.
The Hard Times: You post every poser-esque question to the r/punk subreddit. Why?
Timmy Lignelli: Well, I’m new to punk so I need to ask if it’s okay to put the Ramones and Sum 41 on the same playlist.
No, you don’t need to ask. Also, no, it’s not okay to do that. What are you, 10? Oh right.
But how else can I ask people for a good YouTube tutorial for learning how to draw the Misfits logo? Or how do I get tips for choosing what color socks to wear to my first punk show when I finally turn 16?
Again, these aren’t things you need an online community to determine.
Or how will I ever discover if there’s a band heavier than Good Charlotte? Granted, I could just go onto Spotify or YouTube and try listening to other punk bands or looking at Related Artists on any platform, but I feel safer asking strangers for approval to do so first. Am I punk if I yelled at my mom to get out of my room without knocking first?
I think you need some confidence and to trust that you can figure these things out on your own.
Are denim jackets still punk? Were they ever punk??? Are you allowed to wear Vans if you don’t skateboard? Is Mike Vallely the greatest Black Flag vocalist of all time? Please, help me!
Holy shit, Timmy. Take some deep breaths and just-
What branch of the military is the most punk to join? I’m terrified of loud noises and people, do you have any tips for going to my first punk show? What is Narendra Modi’s favorite punk band?
Never mind. Reddit is the perfect place for you.