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We Sat Down With That Crazy Guitar Guy From “Mad Max: Fury Road” and Asked Him Whether He Prefers a Maple or Rosewood Fretboard

2015 had a lot to offer. There was that one new Ought album and life hadn’t totally gone down the shitter yet. But the cream of the crop had to be Mad Max: Fury Road. Eight years later and there are still so many unanswered questions about the stunt performances. Luckily, we were able to sit down with the guitar guy and asked him to reveal all his secrets for his gnarly tone.

The Hard Times: First and foremost, it’s truly an honor to sit down with you. I mean, when someone thinks of Mad Max: Fury Road (2015), they think of the crazy guitar guy. So, what’s it like being the crazy guitar guy?
Crazy Guitar Guy: Well, my name’s Coma the Doof Warrior so I’d appreciate it if you’d jot that down for the record. People love me when I’m laying down a sick riff but whenever they ask for the “crazy guitar guy,” everyone thinks they mean Eric Clapton.

I could see why that’s a problem but you’ve gotta be a mainstream artist at least in the wasteland. Do you make enough to make a living?
I suppose so, but that rat fuck Immortan Joe is always asking for a cut. First, he wanted access to all the water in the aquifer and I said sure. Now, he’s forcing me to give up 70% of my profit for “business expenses” even though I know he’s spending it on that white powder shit.

Well, how about we talk a little about your setup? Guitar nerds across the universe have bickered back and forth on this forever, so I gotta know. Maple or rosewood?
That’s easy, it’s maple. Have you ever been on top of the Doof Wagon zooming across a desert and tried using rosewood? Yeah, good luck with that buddy. Have fun playing Yo La Tengo with your guitar for two hours before it fucking withers away.

Really? Don’t you think maple is a bit tougher on the hands?
Listen, pal. There’s not a single bottle of lotion left in the wasteland. My hands are a lost cause.

It sounds like the wasteland is unforgiving. I imagine your tuning setup has to be sturdy.
I have to use spark plugs as tuning machines because it’ll be a cold day in Valhalla before I use one of those non-locking Squier pegs. But still, the strings don’t hold a tune for long, especially since I have to reach my quota on the whole whammy bar flamethrower thing.

You know, I heard a story that you actually lost both your eyes due to your guitar strings snapping.
No, you asshole, I am actually blind from birth. That’s it, one more dogshit question and I’m leaving.

Well, have you ever considered playing an acoustic set for the war party?
No one has ever heard a soft folk song and wanted to run over somebody, so fuck you. I’m leaving now, I gotta go blow the sand out of my amps before the next battle.