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We Reviewed John Mellencamp’s “Small Town” Because We Listened to the Wrong Controversial Song

Controversy in the world of music is nothing new and the stellar reporters here at The Hard Times are always on top of the latest kerfuffle. Except in this case when we accidentally interviewed John Mellencamp instead of Jason Aldean over their respective small town songs. Whoops!

The Hard Times: John, thank you for sitting down with us today. Let’s be frank, you really stepped in it this time.
John Mellencamp: What the hell are you talking about? What did I do?

Oh don’t play dumb with us, Mellencamp. Be honest, why do you hate people of color?
What did I do to make you think that’s the case?

I mean your small town song is just brimming with racist dog whistles. Like when you wrote, “But I’ve seen it all in a small town/Had myself a ball in a small town.” How do you explain that?
In what way is that lyric racist?

Yeah I’ll be honest, I’m not really sure either. Most of the lyrics seemed pretty inoffensive. But our editor told us to cover the “Try That in A Small Town” controversy.
You idiot. That’s Jason Aldean’s song, not mine.

Oh. So you don’t advocate for shooting protesters?
I’m literally a gun control activist.

And your thoughts on the BLM protests?
I left Columbia Records when the president of the company made a racist remark. How do you think I feel about BLM?

So you don’t hate anyone?
I hate stupid-ass reporters who try to infer that I’m a racist.

And there you have it, folks. While he may not be a racist, John Mellencamp confirms that he does, in fact, hate the concept of the free press. #CancelJCM

Photo By Chitrapa